ICE CREAM MAN (2026) REVIEW

Joshua Lightfoot

8/6/26

86 minutes

‍ ‍Diary of a Wimpy Kid (2010) meets I Drink Your Blood (1970) in Eli Roth’s new independent horror movie Ice Cream Man. The director of Cabin Fever (2002) and Hostel (2005) has an extensive filmography in the genre. Only one of his films I actually enjoyed, that being Thanksgiving back in 2023. The truth is I never cared much for many of Eli Roth’s films. I know I’m not the only one. Before the feature started, we were treated to a trailer for Eli Roth’s new film titled Don’t Go in that House, Bitch! starring Snoop Dogg (you read that right). I surprisingly found the trailer to be pretty funny and amusing. After Ice Cream Man was over, my curiosity for Don’t Go in that House, Bitch! fell off a cliff.

There’s a new ice cream man in town, and little Jared suspects something is wrong with him. If you see an Ice Cream Man with a creepy 70’s porn star mustache I hope you would run for your life. Unfortunately, the residents of this small town happily accept his company and buy the ice cream he is selling. But the sweet taste of frozen dairy comes at a deadly price when any child who consumes it turns into a zombified murderer. Their violent behavior after eating the ice cream is triggered by a crappy looking AI cartoon video with an obnoxious song that overtakes every cell phone and TV screen in town. The plot is, as expected, razor thin.

I must admit that there is one place where this movie works. Watching kids murder adults in new, creative, and hilarious ways is quite entertaining. I laughed quite a bit at all the chaos that is displayed. Think about the 3rd Final Destination movie. It’s bad, right? But what’s the one thing about it that makes it so entertaining to watch? The creative kills of course. Ice Cream Man has plenty of those. Most of them had me laughing in the theater. Watching a child smash an adult’s skull in with a fire extinguisher like Gasper Noe’s Irreversible is funny to me. Seeing 2 kids play tetherball with a severed head is just my sense of humor. But where does the movie fail? Well, it fails at absolutely everything else.

Attempts are made at character development. There’s a scene where our young lead Jared (played by Charlie Zeltzer) is having dinner with his family, his dad (played by director Eli Roth), mom (played by Karen Cliche), and sister (Sarah Abbott). I’ll bet if I got out my stopwatch, this scene would only last about 2 minutes. This 2-minute scene in this 86-minute movie feels like it goes on for half an hour. It’s so poorly written, sloppily put together, boring to sit through that it is mercifully one of the few attempts at any real character anything. Jared’s sister was dating a douchebag guy who shows up (played by Dylan Hawco) and go on and on about wanting another date, she is too needy and expensive, yada-yada. Nobody is going to care about any of this.

You might be aware of the original The Ice Cream Man from back in 1995. That movie had actor Clint Howard as the Ice Cream Man going on a killing spree. This new film is its own thing and not a remake. This modern Ice Cream Man is played by Ari Millen, who never says a word, always has a creepy smile, and plays his role like he’s trying to be the next Art the Clown from the Terrifier series. His backstory is nonexistent until the final act where an old guy locked in a freezer spills out everything at once. It all feels so lazy and penciled in. The last-minute explanation is delivered with such a lackadaisical attitude. I don’t understand why they even bothered delivering a backstory at all.

‍ ‍Now for the use of AI that is already sending the internet into a firestorm. I remember when Late Night with the Devil (2023) was released, a lot of anger and calls for a boycott filled Twitter (X or whatever) when it was revealed that 3 still intermission title cards were created using AI. It amounted to no more than 10 seconds of the actual movie. Not sure why the filmmakers couldn’t just, you know, make them the old fashion way. The hatred and disgust were probably enough to make those filmmakers realize that maybe they should never do that again. Here comes Eli “hold my beer” Roth who is using AI for things where it doesn’t even feel necessary, like a child with a new toy that he can’t put down. The AI art usage looks terrible and lifeless. It lacks any physics and composition, to the point where it took me out of this already below average movie. I doubt the director sees it this way, but as a viewer, it’s rough. Stick to things being practical, Eli. Your fans will appreciate it better.

‍ ‍OVERALL

‍ Eli Roth’s Ice Cream Man is over the top and unapologetic, as it should be. But the real horror lies in its obnoxious overuse of AI. Roth had to know this was going to blow back in his face. Then again, we’re talking about the credited director of Borderlands (2024). The plot is thin, the characters are annoying, and the explanation is haphazard. After it was over, all I got from this was the urge to go to Ted Drewes.

RATING

** out of 5